Confusion of Love
by Blue rose water
Summary: "Lenore x Ragamuffin" Lenore is confused about love and Ragamuffin is explaning it to her. Sadly he is not so good at it... Warning adult humor, No cursing or sexual but adult no less. Great for a good laugh though. I now think that I will make this into a series of oneshots. I have seen others do it and since Lenore seems to be lacking stories I will make a few little ones. Enjoy!


I do not own "Lenore the cute little dead girl" I also do not own any of the characters though I wish I did. But sadly I do not! I only own the story. Enjoy! I did a bit of editing due to some comments that I got. However I must say that the two end paragraphs are not rushed, though they may seem it. They are simply Ragamuffins thoughts being over heard by us nosy readers.

"AHHHHHH! Kill it! Kill it! Kill it! Kill it!" Lenore was running around in circles and screaming.

"Lenore will you please be my bride!" Mr. Gosh was standing in the middle of the circle that Lenore was running in. He was holding red roses and a heart shaped box of chocolate with the words "Lenore my love" carved into it.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Lenore let out an even louder scream when Mr. Gosh began to step closer to her.

Ragamuffin heard screaming from somewhere in the house and immediately knew it was

Lenore's voice. He quickly followed her voice through the house until he came to a closed door at the end of one of the many hallways. "Lenore are you OK!?" Lenore could hear Ragamuffin's voice on the other side of the door but was too busy screaming and trying to fend off Mr. Gosh to answer. Ragamuffin tried to open the door, but all the handle did was rattle, the door didn't budge. "Lenore unlock the door! Lenore! Lenore! Lenore answer me!" Ragamuffin was now getting worried if Lenore wouldn't even answer him then it must be bad. "Hang on Lenore I'm coming!" Ragamuffin began to throw himself at the door repeatedly.

"My love please let me kiss you!" Mr. Gosh was really close now and had his arms wrapped around Lenore and was inching his face closer to her. "Don't worry I locked the door nailed it shut and boarded all the windows so that no one will disturb us!

"I thought that I stuffed you down the garbage disposal and then burned you into ashes!" Lenore was panicking and didn't have any weapons. She had already thrown all the knives at him and none of it was working! He just kept walking as if it were nothing. "I even sealed the ashes in a jar and buried it 36 feet under the ground with concrete covering it!"

All of a sudden there was a loud crash and a vicious snarl. "When will you ever learn!?" Mr. Gosh was ripped off of Lenore and thrown into the opposite wall. Ragamuffin was panting and had wood splinters sticking out of the right side of his face, his right arm, and right hand. He was in his humanoid form and his eyes were glowing bright blood red. He had run into the room right after he shattered the door. Once he got into the room he began looking around afraid that something terrible had happened to Lenore. He froze when he saw Mr. Gosh about to kiss Lenore and almost lost it right there and then. He immediately ran over and threw him off of a shaking form of Lenore. He was careful to not touch the knives that were sticking out of Mr. Gosh's body. They were everywhere and this guy still kept walking! Well the least that could be said about him was that he was persistent…..

"Wait how did you get in here!?" Mr. Gosh was now pealing himself off of the wall and was glaring at Ragamuffin. One moment he was about to share the blissful kiss of love with his sweet Lenore and the next he was face planted into the wall.

"The door, how else?" Ragamuffin was smirking and standing in front of a shaking Lenore protectively. He knew that Mr. Gosh wouldn't give up that easily, he would probably try to go for Lenore again despite the fact that Ragamuffin was standing in front of her.

"The door but..." Mr. Gosh turned to look at the door that was well... most definitely not a door anymore that's for sure... The door, or at least what used to be a door was completely ripped off of its hinges and the handle was completely gone... Like as in there was a fine pile of dust that looked to be the same color of the handle lying on the floor... And the door its self was shattered... not broken not smashed... no were talking shattered... as in completely demolished.

"H-h-how... did you...?" Mr. Gosh was stunned as he looked at the door in awe. He hadn't heard Ragamuffin break down the door since he was so absorbed with Lenore.

"Was never a fan of locked doors. They bug me, I like to have free reign." Ragamuffin was still smirking but had not moved from his protective spot in front of Lenore.

"W-w-well it doesn't matter! Nothing can stop love especially not mine!" Mr. Gosh launched himself at Lenore who was behind Ragamuffin.

Ragamuffin rolled his eyes, he was right Mr. Gosh was going to try to get to Lenore despite him standing right in front of her. "Sigh... you just never learn..." Ragamuffin using inhuman speed caught Mr. Gosh by the throat in midair and held him above his head. "How many times to I have to tell you that it is really creepy that you're going after a 10 year old girl. Really it's almost kind of sick... if we weren't dead I would have called the cops on you by now..."

"How many times do I have to tell you that she's been ten for a LONG time? Shesh man, you make me sound like a pedophile or something. Really she is a lot older than she looks!" Mr. Gosh didn't seem phased at all by the prospect of being strangled. After all that Lenore had done to him this was nothing in fact he could barely feel it.

"Well in appearance that is how it would look. You honestly do look like some Pedophile who is harassing a little girl." Though Ragamuffin had to admit that he did have a point about Lenore being a lot older than ten. After all he first met her around 100 years ago when he was first turned into a doll. She had been alive at the time and even though she still acted and looked like a ten year old girl she was a lot older than that. "Really even if she is older you should really get the point! We shouldn't have to keep trying to _Re_ kill you! You should have stopped a while ago. Plus that I'm running out of artistic ideas on how to dismember you….." Ragamuffin mumbles the last part.

"Never! You will never stop me from loving my Lenore!" Mr. Gosh was still limp but he began to wiggle as if trying to get out of his grip.

"You know... I can't tell if you like her because of how she looks (Which would prove my point of you being a pedophile) or because of her personality cause from what I have seen she has never really been nice to you... Or at least not without trying to kill and trick you in the process…." Ragamuffin was tightening his grip in response to Mr. Gosh's wiggling.

"I love everything about her! Though I must admit her beautiful looks also hold me tightly. Her figure though not curvy does have a type of appeal to it that calls me. Though flat chested she is….." Mr. Gosh was using a dreamy voice when he said all of this.

"Just as I though... you sick Pedophile." Ragamuffin interrupted Gosh's little list immediately not wanting to hear the rest. He quickly threw Mr. Gosh through the window nearby through the boards and the glass. It was around a three story drop from there. "Yeah he won't be bothering us for a while at least. Ragamuffin was looking out of the hole that Mr. Gosh has made and was rubbing his hands together as if clearing them of dust.

He turned to look at Lenore who was giving him a weird look. "What is a pedophile?"

Ragamuffin smacked his forehead; he really didn't want to go into details of this with her. "A pedophile is someone older who likes younger children." Yeah that should do it! She wouldn't need any explaining after that. He also made a mental note to kill Gosh again the next time he came back from the Grave. After all there was no doubt that he would come back. Oh yah… he would be back alright….

Lenore's face seemed to scrunch up in thought before she pointed at Ragamuffin, "Doesn't that make you a pedophile?" She asked innocently.

Ragamuffin sputtered and looked at Lenore in disbelief, "What?"

"Well I mean you like me right? I don't think you hate me since you saved me from Mr. Gosh and the zombies. So that means you like me. Making you a pedophile." Lenore was confused that's what he said though, that it was an older person who liked little kids. He had told her that he was over 400 years old... so no matter who he liked he would always be a pedophile right? Since everyone was younger than him.

"Well yeah... but that is not what I meant!" Ragamuffin was dumbfounded what did he say to that? "I don't like you for your looks or body like a pedophile would. I like you for your personality! It's completely different!"

"Oh, really... So even though your around three hundred years older than everyone its ok for you to like people? Cause from what you told me a Pedophile is someone who is older that likes younger children. Well compared to you we are all like children. Am I right?" Lenore looked up at Ragamuffin innocently.

Ragamuffin was blushing like crazy and had no idea what to say to any of this. She did have a point about his age and the fact that no matter who he liked he would indeed be a great deal older than them. But when it came to vampires age rules where a little bit different... "It's a little different for vampires. We age differently so you can't really compare it..."

"Really? So it's ok that you like me?" Lenore asked while looking up at the taller form of Ragamuffin.

"Well there a different types of like... If I were to like you in such a way that Gosh does for instance, then since you are around a hundred years old despite your looks it would be ok... I guess... Since I would like you for your personality and not your looks..." Ragamuffin was struggling to explain this. He had no idea what to say. How did they get onto the topic of him liking her in a romantic way?

"Hmmmm... Do you like me?" Lenore looked at Ragamuffin with big eyes.

"Well... yeah, I like you... You're my friend after all..." Ragamuffin was blushing bright red at this point.

"Good, I like you too." Lenore said in a matter of fact tone.

"Waite what!?" Ragamuffin quickly asked.

"Well I'm going to bed now. I'm all worn out." Lenore yawned and walked out of the room not answering Ragamuffin's question.

"Wait... What did you mean..." Ragamuffin softly called after her. He got no answer and was left standing there to ponder her words. Did that mean that she liked him in a romantic sense? Or did she mean friendship?

Ragamuffin shook off those thoughts after about 10 minutes and shrugged. She was such a confusing girl, but he cared for her. He would always protect her and he would gladly wait another 300 more years if that was what it took for her to "like" him back. But unlike Mr. Gosh he would be discrete and quiet about it. He would support her and watch out for her, and he would wait. After all she was the one who broke his spell... sort of... ok so it kind of failed, but she got him moving again and that was almost just as good. He owed her his life and cause of that he would go through the rest of eternity with her. He would wait and hope, because he knew that she was his and that no matter what he wouldn't let anyone else touch her. After all she belonged to him even if she didn't know it yet. Vampires were very possessive creatures after all no one was allowed to touch what was theirs. With these thoughts Ragamuffin left the room smiling. "Well I guess I better go scrape gosh off of the ground and bury him again."


End file.
